And….we’re back.

Sorry, I got off track a little bit, but I’ve been preparing some interesting posts for this site, at least they’re what I would call interesting. And with the Memorial Day weekend in there I didn’t feel like starting something new when I should be out eating hamburgers and hot dogs.

I’ve decided that for the next four days I will go on a classic fad diet. So starting tomorrow I will be doing the TWA Stewardess Diet. What guy doesn’t want to look like this:

You see, back in the good old days, stewardesses (aka flight attendants) had to be hot. This made the flight a lot more palatable for the traveling businessman. A sexy young blonde in a tight outfit gave a man something to think about besides plummeting to earth every time the plane took a dip. Back in the days when there were no TVs in the seats in front of you and few in-flight movies, the stewardesses were the whole show. Unfortunately as time has passed we’ve lost this notion that our flight attendants, waitresses, and spongebath nurses should be hot, young, foxes. Now, in the spirit of being inclusive we’ll let anybody who can fit down the aisle give you your peanuts. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that there is no place in the work world for the homely girls. For instance they could get wearing a mascot costume, perhaps dressed as a meatball handing out flyers in front of an Italian restaurant. Or they could become welders or have a job where they clean up toxic waste or some other mask-centric career. I’m just saying that I took a flight last weekend and my flight attendants were two bald, gay, men. They did their job perfectly adequately and they were friendly and nice, but when you get on board expecting Candy and Trixie and instead you get Bruce and Lance, it’s a bit of a disappointment.

So the mythology behind the Stewardess Diet is that this is the diet that TWA stewardesses (or any airline stewardess) would use to get in shape for their skimpy outfits. We’ll see how it works for me.